Category: Real Person Fic
Characters: Julian Barratt, Noel Fielding
Pairing: Noel Fielding/Julian Barratt
Genre: Fluff, PWP (porn without plot)
Warning: BDSM, Smut (graphic sex scenes)
Length: 1-5k words
Story Notes: Disclaimer: Didn’t happen. Made up. Don’t sue please. I got no money. 🙁
Chapter Notes: Had trouble with the characterisation with this story, so please tell me if it’s okay or not.
Noel stood, eyes lost in to the ones in the mirror. His own.
This was his routine. Every night. He’d start to brush his teeth, then he would catch his own eye in the mirror and spend 10 minutes staring at his features until Julian pulled him out of the bathroom, and made him brush his teeth in the kitchen.
Even then, it was not guaranteed to stop him. He would admire his pointy assets in the toaster, or the kettle, or a spoon, or anything shiny, tin foil sometimes. These would just exaggerate the various parts of his face, causing him to be even more hypnotized by his own reflection.
This was the routine, and Julian was getting tired of it, though his biceps had built up from the continuous pulling of Noel’s petit frame. It’s much harder than it looks, trying to separate Noel and a shiny surface.
But he always refused to depart the mirror. He would try to protest, which was increasingly difficult with a mouth full of toothpaste. He’d end up forcing it on the mirror, carpet, and both their clothes. It dribbled down Noel’s chin and Julian would be made to clean everything up.
Some days, he considered leaving Noel’s toothpaste-filled spit on the mirror, then he wouldn’t see himself, and he wouldn’t need to drag him through to the kitchen.
The truth is, through the anger that surfaced, Julian secretly loved it. To have Noel wriggling in his arms every night was seen as a gift from Noel’s vanity.
Of course, Noel was a bit preoccupied to notice how much fun Julian was actually having.
His squirming knocked over various shampoo bottles and the rest of his products, making him even more determined to stay in the bathroom. To clean up after himself.
He’d probably even clean the mirror. The only thing he would be prepared to polish.
Tonight was the same as every other night, yet somehow, completely different.
Julian was sick of the routine, so he thought he’d mix it up a little. Odd, seen as Noel was usually the one to break repetitiveness.
Julian’s fingertips reached Noel’s waist and began to tickle violently, causing him to spray the room with the white substance he’d created with the toothpaste and his saliva.
With Julian’s free hand he swiped a towel from the chrome towel rack and wiped Noel’s face gently. He then leant Noel over the sink, allowing him to dispose of the rest of the liquid.
He nodded in gratitude, yet somehow, Julian kept tickling his companion, who was now able to laugh without causing a mess.
They struggled their way into the lounge, Noel twisting and kicking the air playfully.
Dumped on the couch, Noel grinned naughtily, suddenly aware of Julian’s presence. Julian was straddled across him, not quite knowing why.
Their little game had seized, so they were left, in a rather suggestive pose. Julian coughed awkwardly, returning to his intrusive state. Noel didn’t care and ragged him down on top of him, unable to resist the temptation set before him.
Noel’s tender lips met Julian’s lustfully. Julian stiffened at the situation he found himself in, but soon relaxed at the thought, and gave in, letting Noel’s tongue explore the whole of his mouth.
Julian was more cautious when it came to Noel’s mouth, yet he continued nonetheless. Persistence was key in these events.
They broke apart briefly, Julian’s tongue tingling from the toothpaste’s after-taste.
‘Minty’. Noel grinned mischievously, feet trying to reach ground, obviously just to get something.
Julian moved, as he was silently instructed to, and Noel returned in several seconds, producing a white tube in his hands.
Julian raised an eyebrow and Noel nodded, a suggestive smile spreading across his pointed face.
Julian scrambled to his feet, and backed away rapidly, almost tripping over as he did so. Noel walked slowly and exaggerated, knowing that Julian would give in to his sexuality… Plus, there was nowhere else he could go, he was forced into a corner…. literally AND metaphorically.
Julian winced at Noel’s touch, trying to resist the overwhelming sense of attraction suddenly welling up inside him.
Noel frantically unbuttoned Julian’s brown Hawaiian shirt, greatly wanting what was underneath.
Julian froze, unable to react, unsure of how to react.
On one hand, he was straight, this was his best friend, why would he be doing this with his best friend?
But on the other hand, he was incredibly turned on, and he thought nothing could help him overcome this feeling, but it was worth a shot. He was sure Noel was able to assist him in satisfying his desire, after all, he did anything for Julian. And for once, this might actually come in handy.
Julian unfroze almost immediately, thoughts vanishing, leaving the problem to be solved by his senses. And touch seemed to be winning. He was unable to hold back any longer.
His fingers reached the bottom of Noel’s mod t-shirt and pulled up in a frenzy, suddenly desperate to fondle Noel’s naked torso.
Noel was taken-a-back by Julian’s eagerness, causing his ‘brow to furrow in confusion for a second.
Julian knew exactly what was racing through Noel’s mind, and smiled mysteriously, making Noel simultaneously smirk, realisation striking him.
Julian slipped off his shirt with ease, and threw it in the corner, automatically realising that he wasn’t stood in the corner anymore, but in the centre of the room.
Noel threw his t-shirt at the wall, no longer caring how neat Julian liked everything. He half-thought that Julian would stop to tidy up his mess, but for once, no. He didn’t move. Didn’t even flinch.
He just carried on stroking Noel’s bare chest, who pulled him in for a long, tender kiss. Julian’s fingers found their way to Noel’s nipples and caressed them softly.
Noel moaned longingly, wanting, needing more than just Julian’s fingers on his chest. He needed to feel Julian’s body heat, he needed to feel Julian’s torso pressing against him.
They broke apart briefly, and as if he had read Noel’s mind, Julian shoved Noel onto the couch, dominating him. He joined him almost immediately, striding him, crotch pushing into Noel’s teasingly.
He sighed pleasurably, assuring Julian that he was doing all the right things.
Noel jerked Julian closer, so close he could feel his breath on his nipples, causing him to shudder with agonising levels of bliss. This told Julian of his next move.
He leaned closer still, face millimetres from Noel’s breast, breathing rough and heavy.
Julian’s tongue out-stretched from the cavity of his mouth and began to taste Noel’s bare front. Noel drew a sharp breath, proving that Julian was doing exactly what he loved most. An inaudible gasp escaped his mouth, and his facial expression changed from pleasure to uncontrollable yearn and weakness; he was completely at Julian’s decretion. Julian was in total control.
A sudden tremour came across Noel; a worrying, forgetting tremour, as if he’d missed out something. A bolt ran through him as he remembered his original plan. He shoved Julian off him abruptly, disturbing Julian slightly, until he realised why Noel had moved.
The tube had landed in the corner, buried under Noel’s and Julian’s shirts, when Noel dropped it, hastily trying to undress.
Julian looked questioningly at the younger man, intrigued as to what he was planning. Noel simply picked up the tube and walked back to Julian, waiting for him to ask the question: ‘What’s that for?’
But he never asked. He stood silently, patiently, anticipating what was to happen next. He never once asked. And this made Noel crave him so much more. Julian was irresistible to him now. Nothing could break this feeling. Nothing.
Noel clambered to get to Julian, only to be pushed back on the couch, toothpaste stolen from his hands. Julian obviously had ideas of his own, flipping the cap off and squirting the minty substance onto Noel’s bare chest, drawing patterns as he did so.
The sudden cool sensation sent tingles down Noel’s spine, numbing his torso with the minty vapours.
Julian’s tongue meet the surface of Noel’s skin with a harsh consciousness, sending rippling vibes coursing through Noel’s anatomy pleasuringly. He moaned gratifyingly as the tingling sensitivity reached all areas of his body unanticipatedly, making it even more satisfying.
Julian wiggled his tongue across Noel’s abdomen, up to his mouth, meeting in a heated, lustful collision of lips. Julian’s tongue thrust wildly between Noel’s teeth and into the moist chamber of his mouth.
Noel did the same, minds silently synchronised, bodies harmonised.
Julian scraped the end of the tube across Noel’s ribcage. He shivered vigorously in response, longing for Julian to do it again. Slower. Longer. Harder.
He moaned enthusiastically as the tube reached his collar bone in one sharp yet steady motion. Julian certainly knew his way round the toothpaste.
Noel unfastened his trousers hastily, dying for the toothpaste to reach other parts of his erroticised body, which were crying out, agonisingly aroused.
Julian anticipated this, and vaulted up, easing his weight from Noel as he tried to undo to button on his waistband. Eyebrows raised and hands down Noel’s trousers, Julian struggled with the fastening, his and Noel’s hands working in time.
With a quick, simple maneuver, Noel’s trousers dropped to the floor, belt thudding as it reached the ground with a harsh force.
Julian’s hands fumbled around the elasticated waistband of Noel’s red and white briefs, deliberately teasing both his and Noel’s crotch, which were throbbing in unison, desperation visible on both men’s faces as Julian played with the elastic one more time.
Noel could take it no longer, and, quick as a flash, Julian hit the wall, suddenly becoming the inferior one in the sick little game they were playing. He didn’t mind. This is what he wanted, no matter whether or not he was the one controlling the situation. To just be in this place was satisfying enough. Just knowing that he made the first move.
Realisation stuck Julian, in the form of Noel’s hardened crotch pushed against Julian’s thigh, restricted both men’s movements. The material of Noel’s pants magnified the size of hi erection, digging into Julian’s leg, through the cloth of his underwear.
Julian, spurred on by the pressure of his penis against his trousers, pulled at Noel’s undergarments, determined to get them off him before the night is over.
Noel predicted this, and kept two firm hands on either side of the pants, Julian’s increasing desperation turning him on more so. His distress only made Noel want to continue to tease even further. Until it would be unbearable. Until he was writhing.
However, Noel knew that he wanted this just as much as Julian. He wouldn’t be able to resist much longer. So it was a case of who would be the first to crack.
Noel, stubborn as he was, could not be defeated by Julian. And Julian, perhaps even more stubborn than Noel, had to decide hastily what was more important: Sex, or being the one with the power.
He could withstand it no longer, a let out a quiet moan, falling to his knees in one clumsy advance, anguish surfacing on his face: Julian Moon was not the person to give in easily.
Noel grinned mischievously.
He’d won. He had control. He had power. He had Julian.
His grin turned Julian’s anguish to longing: a silent craving.
‘Teeth’ Noel muttered. That’s all he said. Nothing more. Nothing less. Yet Julian got exactly what he meant, and complied obediently.
Julian’s teeth connected with the elastic of Noel’s drawers and pulled down sharply. The fabric scraped against Noel’s pulsating genitals with painful delight.
His pants didn’t move, so Julian pulled harder, accidently grazing his teeth down the shaft of Noel’s erect penis. He screeched loudly, and Julian’s face was overcome with guilty until he saw the look on Noel’s face, which slowly gained a twisted smile, worrying Noel slightly as to what he had planned.
Suddenly, the toothpaste tube laid on the floor seemed to scream out to Noel. He dashed for it, Julian left on his knees, stunned at how fast the little man could move. Well, not little. There wasn’t anything little about Noel. Except maybe his waist.
As if he was never gone, Noel stood, overshadowing Julian, hands on hips, toothpaste at the ready. He carelessly threw the tube at Julian, letting him use it at his discretion, knowing exactly what Julian would want to do with it. Noel was playing mind games with is friend. Letting him believe that he had some say in the event about to ocNoel clamberedcur.
Julian flicked the toothpaste lid up and began to squeeze the minty substance into his hands, covering the whole surface of both of them before throwing the tube back on the floor, waiting to be picked up again when it’s Julian’s turn to be pleasured.
Julian’s hands reached Noel’s pants and yanked them down. They hit the floor with very little force, and Julian’s hands grasped Noel’s aching penis, causing him to groan, pleasure coursing through every inch of his body. Julian knew exactly how to please the little man.
The white liquid covered the shaft of Noel’s penis, the toothpaste sending fumes flowing through his petit frame. Suddenly, he was overcome by a tingling sensation, causing him to shudder with new-found pleasure.
Julian longed for Noel to do the same to him, so he began to massage Noel’s penis thoroughly, yet speedily, desperate to be the one getting the action.
Noel’s breathing became rapid panting. Julian’s hand action and Noel’s breathing synchronised, both speeding as Noel came to climax.
Noel shivered violently as he orgasmed. Julian’s hand filled with a new white substance which Noel released.
‘My turn’ Julian thought. He watched Noel carefully, studying his movement, uncertain of exactly what he was doing.
Noel pulled up his pants and returned to his spot by the mirror.
Julian couldn’t help but roll his eyes and sigh exaggeratingly, no matter how secretly pissed off he was.
End Notes: Thanks for reading. (: Reviews still very much appreciated. XD