Category: The Mighty Boosh
Series: The Hurting to Protect Series
Pairing: Howard Moon/Vince Noir
Warning: Violence - Mild
Length: 1-5k words
Hurting to Protect by MB4ever
It’s been a week since Vince and Howard opened up to each other and became a couple. No-one else knew about it except Naboo, the shaman in charge of the kiosk and Bollo, Vince’s animal best mate, who both couldn’t be happier for them.
The Electro Poof and Jazz Maverick desided to keep their feelings for each in check while working around the zoo, but as soon as they got to their hut afterwards, no-one would dare disturb them.
They were very happy together until…
“Moon! Get in my office, now! Thank you” Bob Fossil’s voice echoed across the zoo from the speaker. Vince moaned his disappointment when he felt Howard move away from him and their nice warm sleeping bag.
“Don’t go to him, stay with me. We haven’t quite finished yet” Vince suggested, in his rather sexy voice. Howard had to bite back a moan of passion and promised his lover that he will be back soon. He got dressed, then left Vince to clean up in the hut as he went over to Fossil’s office.
Inside, he found Fossil, dancing around to his ‘I Don’t Like Cricket’ tape in his radio. To the right of him was Dixon Bainbridge, with his face in his hands in embrassment. Howard gave a loud cough, making Fossil jump in the air and turning off his tape “Moon, you frightened the life out of me. And you interrupted my love dance to Bainbridge”.
Howard looked over to the zoo owner, who actually looked more relived and thankful that the music stopped “What did you want me for, Fossil?”
“Actually Moon, I wanted you” Bainbridge stated “I know what you and your weird friend Noir have been up to, and I’m sick of it”
Howard panicked for a moment, then reclaimed his calm posture from before “I don’t know what you’re talking about Bainbridge, we haven’t been doing anything wrong” The owner then got out some pictures and laid them on the desk. Howard picked them up and looked shocked at what he could see on them, on one of them was him and Vince kissing in their hut, another was of them sleeping together in their now one sleeping bag, smiles plainly seen on their faces.
“Where did you get these?” The Jazz Maverick asked, a little disgusted that Bainbridge had these.
“I sent this idiot here to get them. It’s amazing what happens when you promise to watch him do that stupid dance” He shook his head in disbelief “Now, here’s what I want you to do: you will break up with Noir and do it well, I will be watching”
It was Howard’s turn to look disbelieved “Why? Why do you want me to hurt him like that?”
“Because I don’t like you and I’d rather see you sad and upset then as happy as you are now”
“Well I’m not going to do it, I’m not going to break his heart like that” Howard shouted, clearly angry and upset.
“Well, if you don’t…” Bainbridge reached into his moustache and bought out a pistol “…Then maybe it’ll be best if I make him premenantly get out of your life”
Howard paled at the sight of the gun “No, you can’t do that. I won’t let you!”
“Then I give you a choice: either you break his heart or I blow his brains out, with you watching” Bainbridge replied, smiling evily.