Fights, fears and affection

Noel and Julian have a fight and Julian doesn't come home.


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Genre: ,




Length: words

Notes: Italics are What junior band did next by robots in disguise, but I changed Junior band to Julian Barratt

Fights, fears and affection by plainjane

Noel sat on the small couch chewing anxiously on his bottom lip. He had expected Julian back by now; he usually didn’t wait this long after a fight to reconcile. Noel stood up and paced the room, wondering if he should go looking for him.

But where to start? Where the hell did Julian go when he was angry? The pub, usually, but it was really late, actually it was really early. 05: 23, to be exact. Right, so not the pub.

Noel flopped down onto the couch again, ruffled his hair distractedly and continued chewing his lip. Julian and Noel often had fights, but never as public as this last one.

Noel and Julian had gone to a club after a particularly good show. Free drinks and congratulations flowing thick and fast. After a few hours both of them were extremely drunk. Julian had stepped on Noel’s foot. Noel had shouted at Julian for being clumsy. Julian shouted at Noel for being in his way. Noel retorted by pointing out that Julian’s “lack of rhythm” made him “oafish.” Julian’s wounded ego got the best of him and he stormed out the club, watched by the many who had been unable to ignore the screaming match. Noel had sat at the bar and brooded.

Noel’s stomach gave a nasty jolt. He knew something was wrong. There was no way Julian could be that angry still. Julian took his pride seriously and was irrational when drunk, but surely he wouldn’t wait this long before coming home to a regretful Noel, and the most fantastic make-up sex. Noel took out his phone for the nineteenth time since coming home at 3. No messages or missed calls. It was time for Noel to break his “no contact after a fight until face to face” rule. He dialled Julian’s number and waited fretfully for him to pick up.

No answer. He tried again, but still he was treated with the incessant ring of the unanswered phone. Noel tried to convince himself that either Julian couldn’t hear his phone, or he was still too angry to talk to Noel. He told himself that any minute, Julian would open the door, scold Noel for shouting, apologise for stepping on his boot and then everything would be back to normal.

Noel checked his watch again, 06: 04. He couldn’t stand waiting, wondering if Julian was alright. Suddenly a thought struck him; maybe Julian had left him, for good. Noel reprimanded himself for being so illogical, but the panic of the thought had already found its place, and the tears that Noel had been avoiding all night cascaded from his beautiful blue eyes.

He shook violently, the anger and worry bursting out of him in long silent sobs. He curled into a ball on the couch, hugged his knees tightly and let the hot tears run down his soft pale face. After a while he was too tired to cry and he fell asleep.

As he slept, he dreamt.

Tell me again about that boy named “Julian Barratt”
He had the energy of a wildcat, and wide open eyes
his hands moved constantly – dancing here, stopping there
Never was still to catch his breath

What happened to “Julian Barratt” the teenager?
His voice broke, his birthday suit felt tight all over
Kissing with tongues became a preoccupation

The sun stretched out and sang golden to him
His eyes became leaden lidded
It crossed his mind never to move
So delicious was this place and feeling

He dreamt about the first time they made love.

Julian and Noel were sharing a double bed in a cheap hotel. They didn’t have enough money to get two rooms and there were no more rooms with two single beds left. It was dark and cold and Noel couldn’t sleep. He lay looking up at the mouldy ceiling, listening to the regular breathing coming from the heap next to him. He shivered a bit, and in his semi drunk and exhausted state, he looked for an easy way to get warm. Before he was aware of what he was doing he had snuggled close to Julian and snaked his arm around his waist. Julian’s eyes fluttered open at the sudden touch. He looked down at Noel

“Hey, Noel, is something wrong?”

Noel looked up into Julian’s deep eyes.

“I, er, couldn’t sleep, and I was cold.”

Julian was too tired to suggest an alternative solution.

“Ah, right. Ok.”

He turned himself a little towards Noel, making himself more comfortable and put his arm around Noel’s shoulders. Noel placed his head on Julian’s chest and sighed contentedly. Julian rubbed his hand along Noel’s arm.

“Wow, you really are cold, you’ve got goose bumps.”

Noel nestled closer.


Julian continued his soft rub, tickling Noel’s arm and after a while his side and hip. Noel murmured in approval. After about five minutes of Noel’s frequent moans of appreciation, Julian felt Noel’s hand move down towards his crotch. Julian shifted uncomfortably, but Noel kept his hand where it was, slowly caressing the fabric of Julian’s boxers. The friction of the material caused havoc in Julian’s nether region. An erection, much to his dismay, grew steadily. Noel brushed his hand over it and Julian blushed furiously and pulled his hips away, but Noel moved closer. Then Julian was aware of another pressure. Noel’s crotch was pressed into Julian’s hip and he too had an erection. Julian was unsure of what to do, but it seemed Noel had a plan. He could now feel Noel’s hot breath on his neck, then the very light touch of Noel’s lips. Julian’s breath caught in his chest when Noel’s lips made firm contact with his neck, nibbling, sucking, and kissing. Julian remained completely still, unsure of what he wanted.

Noel ran his hand over Julian’s stomach, moving slowly up towards his chest, he located one of Julian’s nipples and gently caressed it, his mouth still firmly attached to Julian’s neck leaving sweet red marks. Julian’s heart raced and his breathing was heavy. Noel moved his mouth up towards Julian’s face and kissed him lightly. Julian finally reacted; grabbing the back of Noel’s head he kissed him fervently. Julian’s lips explored Noel’s roughly and sometimes clumsily. Noel straddled him and kissed the nape of his neck, causing Julian to tilt his head back. Noel moved down to his chest, he flicked his tongue over a nipple and carried on his downward quest, placing kisses every few centimetres. He reached the edge of Julian’s boxers, Julian’s erection more evident than before, and looked up at Julian questioningly. Julian gazed down at him, confused yet eager, his eyes shining. Noel slipped his fingers under the waist band and very slowly slid the boxers off. Julian took a shuddering breath. Noel’s mouth hovered over Julian’s penis, long hard breaths teasing over the throbbing erection.


He looked up at Julian.

“I… um, it’s too impersonal this way…”

Noel frowned but crawled up the bed and straddled Julian once more.

“What do you want then?” he whispered, his voice shaking slightly.

“Well, um,” Julian faltered, “something more intimate.”

Noel nodded and got up and walked into the bathroom, leaving Julian confused and naked on the bed. Noel came back moments later holding a jar of Vaseline.

“I think we’ll need this then.”

Julian propped himself up against his pillow.

“I’ve never done this before.”

“Me neither.”

Noel walked back over to the bed, placed the jar on the bedside table and removed his boxers. He then picked up the jar again, opened it and dipped his fingers into the cold, oily substance. He climbed onto the bed and wasted no time in taking Julian’s cock in his hands, smoothing the Vaseline evenly over it.

“Um…” Noel murmured, unsure of what next to do.

Julian took charge. He pulled Noel onto the bed next to him, making him lie face down. He moved on top of him and Noel spread his legs, making space. Julian very slowly eased his way in, careful to look for signs of discomfort. A sharp intake of breath and Julian stopped.

“Carry on,” Noel whispered.

Julian continued his slow penetration. When he was all the way in, he lay there for a while, allowing Noel and himself to become used to the feeling. He stroked the hair away from Noel’s neck and tenderly kissed him.



Julian began a slow rhythm, gently moving in and out, rocking gently. Noel’s erection throbbed against the bed. Julian’s pace quickened, sending Noel into ecstasy. His muscles contracted around Julian, causing him to orgasm as well.

They lay there for a while, panting. Julian eventually got off Noel and lay next to him. Noel bent his head towards Julian’s chest and curled an arm around his waist. Julian hugged Noel tightly towards him.

“I love you,” Julian said softly, “I have for a while.”

“Me too, Ju,” smiled Noel.

He was off like a dream
Dizzy from the heat, but oh! so content
He felt like he was in love
Or that it would feel like this

Noel awoke with a start. He stretched his aching legs and checked his watch, 7: 18. Suddenly he heard a thump outside the front door. He got up and opened the door. He gasped. Propped up against the wall was Julian, his face a mangled mess. Noel rushed up to him and helped him inside and onto the couch.

“Ju! What happened?!”

The sun moved away to the other side of the sky
Cold seeped through the green
Underneath grew moist with the night
“Julian Barratt” lay still, his back becoming wet
He felt scared

Half of Julian’s face was swollen and bruised. His one eye was barely open and incredibly bloodshot, his lip was split and he had a gash above the swollen eye.

“I was jumped after I left the club,” his voice was scarcely audible.

His face and eyes were cast down ashamedly. Noel was on his knees at Julian’s feet, his hand on Julian’s knee and his face turned up towards Julian’s, wracked with concern.

“I thought they were going to kill me,” he continued in a soft voice, “I was so scared. The next thing I knew, I woke up in an alley and it was light already.”

He was unable to carry on and large silent tears ran down his cheeks. Noel sat next to him and cradled him in his arms. Julian quivered as he wept into Noel’s torso. Noel stroked Julian’s hair comfortingly and realised that he too was crying. He wiped away his tears and Julian looked up. Noel kissed his less bruised cheek.

“You’re safe now.”

Noel hugged Julian tightly and Julian winced.

“Did I hurt you?”

“My ribs…”

Noel slowly unbuttoned Julian’s shirt. His side was bloodied and bruised.

“We need to get this cleaned up.”

Noel went into the kitchen and returned with a bowl of warm water, antiseptic and a towel. He dabbed the wounds on Julian’s face first, with each touch of the cloth he grimaced and his eyes still glistened with tears. Noel finished cleaning his face and moved onto his torso, all the time biting his lip and frowning with concentration and worry. When Noel had finished with Julian’s chest he lifted up Julian’s chin and smiled.

“There we go, good as new,” he crooned.

Julian remained silent, his eyes cast down and distant.

“Ju, talk to me. Is something else the matter?”

Still Julian said nothing.


Finally his eyes met Noel’s. Noel gazed deeply into them, searching for the problem. He saw terror and humiliation. Noel frowned.

“Did something else happen?”

Julian’s eyes filled with tears and as he spoke they streamed down his face.

“I was… They…” he stuttered.

“Ju, you can trust me.”

“I was raped, Noel.”

Noel was in complete shock.

“Oh! Ju!”

He enveloped Julian in his arms and squeezed him tightly, ignoring the bruised ribs. Julian’s face was buried in Noel’s neck and his tears soaked Noel’s shirt. Noel sobbed along with Julian and the two of them shook.

“I’ve been so stupid, Julian,” gasped Noel, after a while.


“I actually thought you had left me when you didn’t come home last night.”

“What? Over a stupid fight about shoes and clumsiness?”

“I told you it was stupid.”

Julian chuckled and Noel smiled.

Did “Julian Barratt” live happily ever after?
He lay through the ice and the north wind
Realising that they were but a different face of his known sun
The recollection of the moments urging long ago forced him onto his feet
Looking into the mirror “Julian Barratt” saw he was a man

The sun stretched out and sang golden anew
Our hero stared her out of the sky
It crossed his mind to ever to move
To delicious places, feelings

He was off on the ride
Burning from the heat, but oh! what intent
He knew the shape of love
Looked like this

Noel led Julian to the bedroom, helped him to get undressed and laid him down in the bed. Noel lay next to Julian and Julian cuddled up closely to him.

“I’m sorry, Ju,” Noel said, playing with Julian’s dirty hair.

“Me too, Noel,” sighed Julian.

“I love you so much.”

“I love you too, little man.”

They both soon fell asleep, entwined in each other. They were completely safe in each others arms.