Category: The Mighty Boosh
Characters: Howard Moon, Vince Noir
Pairing: Howard Moon/Vince Noir
Genre: Fluff, Holiday - Christmas
Challenge: Challenge 03: Christmas
Length: <1k words
Notes: Oh my god this is so fluffy it sickens me. Also, why don’t I get presents like this?
Christmas Fluff by phoon
Howard woke up to find Vince sucking on his neck. This was unexpected. Not unpleasant, but still shocking enough for Howard to be totally justified in shrieking and flailing up from the couch. He hit Vince in the face, tripped over some cowboy boots lying on the floor and fell face first onto the rug in front of the telly.
“Ow.” He said, his voice muffled by the shag carpet.
“Ow? What about me?” Vince was clutching his nose, slumped on the floor. “You could’ve broken my nose! Its swelling. Is it swelling?” He took his hand away for a moment, only to slap it back. “Ow! Oh my god, oh my god, what am I gonna do? I can’t be a rock star with a huge nose!”
“You could be a boxer.” Howard said, standing up gingerly.
“A boxer? Have you seen these arms?” Howard had, often, due to the sleeveless tops Vince always wore. “Heroin chic, yeah? I can’t lift heavy boxing gloves!”
“Yeah yeah.” Howard winced as he pressed his fingers gently against his neck. “Ow, hey… is that a love bite?” Vince smiled, hands dropping away from his very not-swollen nose, and nodded almost shyly.
“Yeah… sorry about that. Got a bit carried away.”
“Carried away? Doing what?”
“Well… you know. It was, sort of… a present?”
“A present? Sucking my neck is a present? Who for? What are you, some kind of electro vampire?” Howard wandered back over to the couch, stepping over Vince legs as he sprawled on the floor. He slumped onto the couch with a groan.
“No, it was for you, ya muppet.” Vince clambered up onto the couch next to Howard and smiled over at him.
“A present for me?”
“Yeah. For Christmas.”
“Christmas?” For the first time that morning, Howard looked around the zookeepers hut. Tinsel was draped over the curtain rails, and around the table edge. And all the chairs, and the tv, and around the sink. It was everywhere. And on the table stood a two foot high, tinsel-free, Christmas tree. A gold star made from cardboard was taped onto the door. “Right. Christmas.”
“I know you don’t like it very much, so I thought I’d make it more fun for you.” Vince leant forward, wrapping his arms loosely round his knees.
“Tinsel.” Howard said, staring at the emaciated tree.
“Yeah. I ran out when I got to the tree.”
“Vince…” Howard flailed mentally for the right words. And failed. “ Huh?!”
Vince sighed heavily. “I wanted to make Christmas special for you, so I… did the place up. You know, a bit of tinsel, a bit of glitter. I made a wreath from kitkat wrappers, genius…”
“No, no, I get the decorating part. Its just…” Howard turned to Vince, who was grinning hopefully at him. “How is sucking my neck a present?”
Vince looked down, and Howard could almost think that maybe he was blushing.
“I didn’t know what to get you.” Vince said quietly. “Cos we’re so different. I wasn’t sure what you wanted. And last night, you were asleep and I was decorating…” Vince bit his lip and looked up at Howard through his eyelashes. “I just had this idea that… Maybe you wanted me?”
Howard stared at Vince, mouth hanging open slightly.
“You…” He said, his voice a little too high.
“I mean, its alright if you don’t. I mean, you don’t have to… take me back to a shop or anything.” Vince smiled brightly, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.
“You’re giving me you as a Christmas present?” Howard eventually squeaked, still staring.
“God, Vince…” Howard rubbed at his eyes, ran his hand through his hair, then slowly reached out to take hold of Vince’s hand.
“Howard?” Vince looked uncertain, tense, until Howard tightened his grip on Vince’s hand and pulled him closer.
“Thanks Vince.” He grinned, before he leant forward and pressed a soft kiss to Vince’s lips. “I love it.”