Baby We’ll Be Fine

Noel and Julian at a hotel. Fluffy porn ensues.

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Notes: title stolen from the song of the same name by The National.


Baby We’ll Be Fine by AJ840

Anyone who assumed it was happening only got it half right. They would guess that the two were fucking, but quietly pitied them for it. It isn’t hard to imagine the complications. The stress of their other relationships and Julian’s children, the pressure of work and press and the proximity all the time. It’s complicated enough being one half of a double act, to add an affair is asking for trouble.

And maybe those people are right. It is indulgent and selfish and most of the time Noel doesn’t understand it himself, how they do this and still function in work and life. It’s not a typical arrangement and there isn’t much precedent for it. But after the better part of a decade, how can he imagine his life any other way? As long as he and Julian are alive they will never be rid of it. It’s like a warm ache within him, where Julian dug a place for himself all those years ago and tied them together. Noel hadn’t realized until then that something had been missing.

They fuck a lot on tour, usually in hotels but sometimes risking a fumble on the bus. The others know but it’s not something they all talk about. Some things are to heavy to bring out into the open. When it’s late and everyone’s just gone past tipsy, Noel sees his chance and moves towards the elevators, touching the small of Julian’s back on his way. It takes some effort for a person like Noel to move among a crowd unnoticed, but he’s practiced at it when he needs to be.

When Julian gets to the room Noel’s laying on the bed in the dark, his feet hanging off the end and his eyes closed. He hears the door click and half-smiles lazily. Julian rasps out a “Hey” and Noel just murmurs in acknowledgement, one hand idly scratching at the duvet.

“It went ok tonight, yeah?” Julian smiles back and presses the conversation on. He gently takes hold of one of Noel’s feet by the ankle and lifts his leg slightly, unzipping the silver boot. Finally Noel opens his eyes to look at him. He feels exhausted and content to lie there while Julian peels off his sock and rests his leg back down. He moves on to remove the other boot, but seems in no particular hurry.

“I reckon. I like this venue at least, we should perform here again.”

Julian toes off his own socks and shoes and lies down next to him. They both look at the stucco ceiling. Noel can feel acutely where their arms touch and as familiar as it is, there’s the same pleasant buzz at the initial contact, and he wants more. Julian senses it too and his hand moves to the warm skin underneath Noel’s shirt and pushes it up, leaning over to lightly kiss him on the stomach, and his mustache tickles and Noel laughs. His heart feels so full and the warm ache that connects him to Julian intensifies, settling deeper inside and growing into a fizzing sort of arousal that leaves him lightheaded.

There are times when they fight or avoid each other or everything becomes complicated and impossible. They are two men in the public eye having an affair, and that situation brooks them no end of complications. But when Noel looks back he mainly remembers times like this one. Julian cradling his leg like it’s precious, removing his boots, finally undressing him piece by piece like he’s taking a Noel apart. Noel isn’t ashamed of nudity but he feels disarmed. He relies a lot on his flashy clothes. They give him confidence, a sense of self, they attract the attention that any showman craves. Without them he’s pure but defenseless, but he always trusts Julian. When they fuck Noel always feels himself unravel, he falls apart and he’s free. It had been like no other sex he’d had before and had terrified him. But afterwards Julian put him back together again, brought them both back to the ground.

Before Noel knows what’s happening his shirt and belt have been taken off and they’re kissing, the pace still lazy and unhurried. He runs his tongue against Julian’s bottom lip; idly catalogues the smoother, tender place where he had chewed on the skin – a nervous habit. Noel starts undoing the buttons on Julian’s plaid shirt, pushing it off his shoulders and breaking away from the kiss to peel off the vest underneath. He’s always a little startled by the warmth of so much skin against his own, and he makes a noise in the back of his throat and presses himself tighter. He suddenly needs to be as close as possible, and his arms wrap Julian’s broad torso until they are hugging tightly on the bed. Julian’s face is buried between his neck and shoulder, and Noel can feel him smile.

He feels a little childish now about the hug, and starts to laugh at himself but then Julian moves so his lips are against Noel’s neck and he’s sucking at the pulse point. His breath is hot and he drags his teeth across Noel’s throat, licking at the hollow and Noel suddenly doesn’t feel like laughing at all.

One of Noel’s hands moves to the back of Julian’s head encouragingly. The other, impatient for the main event, moves down between their legs. He unzips Julian’s jeans and tugs them down slightly but leaves his pants in place. With the tips of his fingers he strokes him lightly through the material, then without warning presses the heel of his hand firmly against the bulge. He’s gratified when Julian thrusts helplessly against him and exhales harshly. Julian’s generally quiet in bed, but Noel can read every movement, every change in his breathing like they were written instructions. He eases off the pressure for now, but he knows he’s upped the game between them. Julian knows it too, and when their eyes meet Noel can see the lust and affection have acquired a new focus, a determination to have what he wants. Noel loves that expression best when it’s directed at him. Because Julian’s generally quiet in bed but he likes the fact that Noel isn’t.

He tugs off Noel’s skinny jeans and pants at the same time, and the lazy atmosphere of earlier has disappeared. Julian presses down to kiss him again and Noel lets out a stuttering moan when his naked cock brushes Julian’s through the thin material. They stay that way for a while, kissing and grinding until Noel is flushed and gasping a little with every breath. Then he decides it’s time to take control of these events, knowing what he wants from this evening He runs his fingernails across Julian’s back, scratching lightly because he knows it makes Julian shiver. With this as a distraction he can flip them over with little resistance. Now he’s on top while they stare at each other breathless, and Noel cannot fucking believe Julian still has his jeans on.

He pulls them off, wishing to himself that there were a sexier way to take off trousers. Soon though, he forgets all the thoughts in his head because Julian is utterly and wonderfully naked at last. Noel should probably be used to the sight by now, but the minute he sees Julian’s cock bob free he wants to suck it so badly that his mouth actually waters. He moves over Julian, sweetly kisses his neck and mutters, “Finally, Jesus Christ” in such a petulant way that Julian huffs out a laugh at his indignation.

Noel’s moving down now, sucking at a spot below Julian’s throat and scraping his teeth along the length of collarbone, not bothering to be gentle about it. Julian’s got one hand twisted in Noel’s hair and the tugging makes Noel purr a little as his tongue presses flat against Julian’s left nipple, one hand coming up to fondle the right one. His other hand is running up and down Julian’s thigh with firm strokes, gradually pushing his legs further apart. Noel pauses for a second just to lean his forehead against Julian’s chest, breathe deeply and rub his nose against the skin. He can feel Julian’s heart loud and fast, his body moving as he breathes. He lets Noel stay there and doesn’t question him. He never really questions Noel when they come together like this, knowing there are things they both need that they don’t have the words for.

Noel lifts his head and smiles when they lock eyes. Then he nudges Julian’s legs up so that his knees are bent and his feet flat on the bed. Noel kisses the newly exposed back of one thigh, then the other. Julian twitches every time he feels Noel get closer to his cock, his breath ghosting over it. He’s leaking and Noel can’t resist licking the tip smoothly, lapping at it like a kitten. They’re both frustrated by now, so with no more preamble his lips are around Julian’s cock and he’s sliding down until it hits the back of his throat. Julian arches a little and makes a choked off noise, suddenly surrounded by soft and wet heat. One hand twists in the sheet and the other moves to the base of Noel’s neck where he can feel the rhythmic bobbing. Noel loved oral sex. Man or woman, giving or receiving, any kind was enjoyable, and he made a point of being good at it.

Noel sucked hard, looking up through the hair that was fanning across Julian’s thighs and stomach. He knew Julian got off on that especially, seeing Noel’s head buried between his legs, seeing him with his mouth full. Noel altered his rhythm, flattening his tongue and then circling it around the head. Julian was softly gasping now, struggling to keep still but keeping his eyes fixed on Noel’s dark hair and hollowed cheeks. Noel liked giving head a little messily, making these obscene slurping noises, salivating and licking wetly, then moving to take Julian’s balls into his mouth.

He was pulled away then by a sharp tug on his hair. Julian looked a little rueful but managed a shaky grin, “ we need to stop that if you want to get fucked properly, yeah?” Noel smirked a little and nodded. He’d have to sacrifice the rush he always got when he felt Julian come in his mouth, but his own cock was sorely neglected and he was desperate to remedy that.

Julian moves to his suitcase and pulls out the lube and condoms he always keeps in the left zip pocket. The room is dark but the brightness of the streetlights and the nearby car park slide over Julian and illuminate his body as he moves back towards the bed. Noel arches up and grins dirtily, being wanton on purpose.

“Hurry up then Ju you must know what to do by now.” He’s laughing but there’s an edge to it and Noel knows that it’s obvious how desperate he’s getting. Julian sits up against the headboard and Noel throws a leg over him again, whimpering a little as their erections jostle together. He hands over the lube and winds his arms around Julian’s neck, pressing their foreheads together and breathing deep. Noel raises himself slightly above the now-slicked fingers and kisses Julian’s temple on impulse. He feels one of Julian’s hands firmly cupping one buttock and kneading the soft flesh, then copying motion with the other. Noel whines and lets his cock bump against Julian’s chest smearing him with precome and making Noel crave the friction again. But before he can thrust up there is a hand is at his hip like a warning. He jumps when he feels the chill of the lube against his slick and heated skin.

Julian’s practiced, and he traces the crease before letting a finger circle the puckered hole and finally finally slip inside him. Noel likes this part too (there’s not a lot about sex he doesn’t like, to be honest). He likes that Julian remains so in control and detached, and he likes the way Julian looks when does this. It’s the same focused determination that Noel loves, the way Julian seems intent on wringing newer, more dramatic reactions from him. He likes pushing Noel to the limits of what he can stand, listening to the different ways he can gasp and whine and moan. He likes the way Noel’s eyes flutter open and closed, like he can’t decide whether to squeeze them shut at the onslaught of sensation, or keep them open and trained on Julian. He nearly always ends up keeping them open. He likes to see the way Julian looks back at him, fascinated and hungry.

“Oh… oh fuck.” Noel breathing is shallower now, Julian’s quickly moved to three fingers. They’ve done this so often that Noel doesn’t need much preparation, his body relaxes at the familiar intrusion. But it still makes him squirm. Julian’s fingers scissor him open and Noel pushes his body down, fucking himself on Julian’s fingers.

“Yeah… yeah. Just can you… oh please Ju deeper I can’t…” He’s grinding himself down, knowing how flushed he must look and he closes his eyes hoping that Julian isn’t smirking at him, about to make some joke about him gagging for it. Noel wants to touch his own cock more than he’s ever wanted anything before, but he feels Julian’s hand steady at his waist and knows that if he tried anything Julian wouldn’t allow it. “It’s not enough… please I’m ready. Oh fuck”

He’s still mumbling nonsense, his litany of Julian Julian Julian interspersed with curses and breathy demands. “Hurry the fuck up. Jesus I’m asking nicely ain’t I? Oh fuck Ju please. Please.”

The fingers are gone suddenly and Noel feels bereft, concentration on rolling the condom on and slicking on more lube. Julian’s eyes close and his head falls back as soon as he’s touched, pushing himself into Noel’s grasp. Noel lets go reluctantly and finds himself tipped over unceremoniously with one of Julian’s arms around each thigh, pushing Noel’s legs up into the air and making him giggle.

Suddenly they’re kissing again and Noel relaxes into it. Julian’s hands move down his thighs before releasing them in favor of exploring Noel’s chest. Noel lets his legs drop looks up at the man braced above him. He brushes away damp curls that have fallen and obscure Julian’s eyes. He writhes a bit, partly for the other man’s benefit and partly to convey his growing impatience.

It’s enough to convince him, apparently. Julian pushes slowly and Noel feels his mouth open of its own accord, breathing getting ragged as he relaxes into the stretch. Noel can vaguely hear Julian’s groan when he slides in all the way, but his mind is preoccupied. He feels so full. All he can see and hear and smell is Julian. The connection he feels, that warm ache, seems to lighten and rise up within him. It flies up to his heart, until he feels himself brimming with a fierce love. He opens his mouth say something, to free it, but all that comes out is a strangled sort of moan. When Julian pulls out and thrusts again Noel feels his muscles tense and he instinctively lifts up to meet him. By the third time they find their rhythm and Julian begins fucking him steadily, ignoring the way Noel is rolling his hips up and hoarsely whispering his name, urging him to go faster.

Just when Noel thinks he might actually go insane at the pace, Julian shifts up slightly. Noel gets the message. One leg moves up and over Julian’s shoulder, the other is bent at the knee and Julian’s weight presses it against his chest. Underneath his desperate need to come Noel feels faintly ridiculous. He wonders ruefully how much longer they can get away with these acrobatics. But he stops thinking in the next moment because Julian’s cock is buried so deep inside him and it’s right where he needs to be touched. It isn’t until Julian mutters something soothing against his neck that he realizes he had been shouting.

After that it doesn’t take Noel long to come, not after all this windup and then Julian moving so quickly and deeply and absolutely fucking perfect. Julian’s hitting that spot inside him over and over and Noel can’t help the sounds he makes. Julian leans down and brushes their lips together, taking Noel bottom lip between his teeth and biting down just this side of too hard and Noel comes like someone flicked a switch, his back arching and Julian swallowing his cry.

He’s still shaking a little with aftershocks as Julian’s thrusts get increasingly erratic and he tenses then comes with a sudden jerk. His head is buried in the crook of Noel’s neck, muffling his groan, and Noel’s leg slides off his shoulder as his arms wrap around the other man’s neck, holding him tightly and feeling their hearts racing side by side where their chests are pressed together. After a few minutes Julian rolls off him Noel smiles, realizing they are back to staring at the stucco ceiling together. This time they’re upside down though, feet resting on the pillows from Julian tipping them over backwards. And they’re naked.

In a while Noel knows they’ll get up to shower, maybe sleep in the same room or maybe split up for the rest of the night. He’s not worried about it. He and Julian, they’ll always be ok. But for as long as he can Noel just wants to lie here with his eyes closed, listening to Julian catch his breath.

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