The Jacket

[Sweet Fic] A little theory of mine how Pete got Stitch's Jacket.

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The Jacket by aprilANXIETY

I walked into my boozer and there was Stitch. He was wearing this well nice jacket. It was all green with a white, faux-fur trim and a hood. It was really nice. And he had these white pants on, too. I have white pants. I could really see myself pulling off such an awesome combination. All the girls would be swooning over me.

I try to touch it.

“Don’t touch me.” He says, per normal.

“Ah, such a joker!” I reach in to touch ‘im again.

“No, seriously, don’t touch me. Ever.” But it’s too late. I’ve copped a feel of the sleeve. The fabric is nice and smooth feeling. I’m havin’ it.

He steals my beer, but that’s okay. Once he’s well sloshed and has that coat unbuttoned, I’m stealing it. I deserve to have that jacket. I mean, look at my hair.

“Where’d you get that jacket?” I ask, trying to sound nonsha-nonchola-cool. I think I did pretty good.

“Oh this?” He asks pointing to the gorgeous jacket. No, you nonce, the other jacket.

“Yeah, it’s really nice.” I decide to play nice; it’s the only way to get the paranoid berk’s guard down.

“I got it a couple years ago, gift from the mum. Only found it the other day in my wardrobe.” Well, I definitely have to steal it now, there’s no way I’ll find it in any store. But that’s okay, he’s focused on the jacket now and the beer’s making him a little warm and he unbuttons the first button.

“Let me get you another pint.” And I order him one. The drunker, the hotter, the better. That coat’s as good as mine now.

“Thanks, Pete. Mighty nice of you.” He says with a genuine smile on his face. Poor gullible sucker.

It seems every ten minutes means another button gets unbuttoned. After forty minutes, he decides to just unbutton the whole thing. Another twenty and it’s on the back of his chair. Now’s my chance.

I pay the barkeep and turn to Stitch.

“Well, I’m off.” And I snatch the jacket right from behind him with enough force his chair tips over.

“Get back here with my jacket, you Cockney bitch!” He yells after me from the floor. But I just slip it over my shoulders and button it up as I head out the door. I can see meself in the reflection of the glass door. I look good.

“Thanks for the jacket, Stitch.” And I turn around to give him a thumbs up and a cheeky smile and leave, laughing all the way back to my flat.


That bitch Pete just stole my jacket! But that’s okay. He looks so perfect in it; like a little boy playing dress-up. But that’s only to be expected. Pete looks perfect in everything. Pete is perfect.

He shows up at work the next day in the jacket and a pair of white pants. He smiles cheekily at me as if to bother me. But I really don’t mind. I like seeing him in my things. It’s just too perfect.


AN: Aww, wasn’t that little bit at the end just too cute! I was watching Sweet again the other day and I noticed that at the beginning when we first meet Stitch he was wearing the same outfit, I figured just budget wardrobe and all, but I came up with a couple theories and here’s the first.

Be on the lookout for more Sweet and Boosh fics. Who knows, maybe even a Mint Royale. You can’t know, because I don’t even know.

Please review, because I have recently discovered that reviews bolster my creative genius and typically lead to more fiction. =) Besides, I’m a slut for reviews. I’ll whore myself on a street corner for them.