A Booshmas Carol

The festive season has reached the Mighty Boosh boys and Vince is as ever in the party mood with Howard tagging behind. But something isn't quite right in their fairy tale world.

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Tradition and wrappings

Tradition and wrappings

It was Christmas morning. Finally and the three sleeping figures were woken up by an alarm clock blurting out some song that Vince has found, it was repeating the message “the sex has made me stupid”, rather befitting to the previous nights occurrences it seemed. Howard rolled over to look at time, an unsightly 6am. Vince normally did not emerge from his room until midday but Christmas was the exception, he was essentially a child in a man’s body. Excited Vince’s bounded out of bed, surprisingly he was fully clothed with his hair and make-up carefully perfected, well surprising to most but Howard was aware that on Christmas day Vince would get up extra early to get ready for the day before going back to sleep. It was a bit of a tradition for him.

“Vince turn that alarm off” Came a yell from the door and a short robe clad man followed with a large gorilla in pursuit. Of course the demand was not heeded, Vince was too busy leaping and jumping around pulling everyone upright, luckily for Pandora Howard had warned her this would happen the night before so she too had dressed herself earlier that morning. Howard of course had not changed since the previous day.

“You want help with the turkey Naboo?” asked Howard hoping that for once the answer would be yes. He was a firm believer in tradition and wanted to cook Christmas dinner how his mother had always done. Naboo however would simply shove everything in a pot then add some sort of magic potion and it would turn into dinner within minutes, was a lot more practical and stressful but it wasn’t the way Howard wanted it to be. The answer to his question was no of course.

Bored already of dancing around the room Vince scuttled into the living area. “Right! Presents” he delved deep into a towering pile of gift wrapped boxes and shapes of all kind and was soon lost amongst the trimmings. Naboo and Bollo quickly followed suit but Pandora simply stood there looking confused.

“Just dive in and look for presents or jump about, essentially it’s like a ball pit made of gifts” Howard explained before he himself took a leap in. Pandora grinned; she liked this kind of Christmas morning.

The five of them delved and burrowed in the presents occasionally picking one up to open it. As usual once gifts were opened the game soon evolved into a paper fight, balls of shimmering wrapping arching through the air. The numerous creature were of course joining in, even Tumnus. Laughing all the flying beasties picked up Naboo by his robe, which was red and green to be festive, and planted the struggling at the top of the tree with the fairy. He blushed from embarrassment as she kissed him delicately on the cheek, every time this happened and he was sure the fairy had a thing for him. A “thing” that would never come to an ultimate climax.

Some indie band was playing on the stereo; it was a CD that was a gift to Vince from one of his mates. The CD inevitably belonged to the gift givers band, his clique were like that you see. Vince was sitting like a toddler surrounded by his toys, but instead of brightly coloured toy cars and animals it was jewellery, clothes, make up and trinkets. “Have you opened your present from me yet?” he asked as he placed numerous rings on his fingers. Howard looked up from the pile of jazz vinyl’s that Leicester had given him and shook his head.

“Where is it?”

Vince ambled over to the tree again and crawled right under it to the very back in the corner and pulled out a parcel that he had obviously put a lot of effort into wrapping. “There you go.”

Peeling back the wrapping paper Howards eyes were accosted with a shot of electric blue, a shot of electric blue in fabric format. It was a coat, similar to a ring masters, short at the front with long tails at the back and purple piping with brocade pockets. He smiled and placed it down on a nearby chair, he dearly loved Vince but wished that he would buy him something he actually wanted.

“Aren’t you going to wear it?” asked Vince obviously upset. Luckily Howard was adept with situations like this.

“I will but dinner is soon and I don’t want to spill food on it.” The excuse seemed to please Vince enough.