Choose-your-own-adventure 1

The boys are filming the third series and something unexpected happens to Noel. Noel isn’t happy and he ends up at a party.

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Denial

Contents

Denial

Author’s Notes: The readers voted for “C: Find a bathroom to pull himself together in”


I still don’t own them and no money has or will be made.

Noel stumbled through the crowd, the room spinning. He made his way to the stairs and almost flung himself down them. Knocking into a few people, he tripped over the last few steps and hurried down the passage, ignoring a familiar voice shout,

“Hey Noel!”

He rushed into the bathroom and slammed the door shut behind him before locking it. Panting heavily, he bent over the basin, a hand resting on either side of it. He took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself. He looked up into the mirror, his reflection a ghostly blur. Rubbing his eyes roughly, his vision cleared and he looked again. His pale and unusually colourless face came into view. His dark brows were furrowed and his thin lips, which normally would be giving a cheeky smile, were turned down.

Noel sighed deeply and ran his slim fingers through his messy hair. Sinking to the floor he held his knees to his chest and tried to stop the memories from floating through his mind. He tried to forget the feel of Julian’s warm body pressed up against his own and the sweet taste of his soft lips. He tried to ignore the patches of skin that still tingled from the touch of Julian’s strong hands. He told himself that his heart fluttering was just nerves, it definitely didn’t mean anything.

There was a knock at the door, which Noel ignored as his most embarrassing memory, while wearing a brightly coloured party hat, decorated his head with annoying paper streamers and hogged the bowl of crisps. The image of his bulging erection taunting him, he felt a familiar twitch in his groin. He pulled at his too tight jeans, adjusting them.

The knock came again, louder now. Noel groaned.

“Er, I’m a little busy in here,” he called.

“Noel?” came Julian’s voice.

Noel sighed and ran his hand down his face,

Great, perfect timing as usual.

“Noel?” repeated Julian.

“Yes?” snapped Noel.

“Are… are you alright?” Julian said tentatively.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” said Noel in the same defensive tone.

“Oh…” came Julian’s reply, “It’s just that when you came down the stairs you looked…”

There was a short pause.

“Look, Noel, open the door yeah?”

Noel hauled himself up off the floor and reluctantly unlocked the door and opened it. He took in Julian’s scruffy appearance. Dirty sneakers, nondescript black trousers, creased band t-shirt, stubbly face and messy hair.

Noel’s heart gave a flutter similar to the previous day’s and he frowned.

“Can I come in?”

Julian waved his hand towards the room Noel was currently blocking with his thin body.

“This is a bathroom, Julian,” Noel stated lamely.

“Gee, what gave you that idea? Was it the floor to ceiling black tiles?” said Julian, peering into the room, “Or perhaps the basin and accompanying small hand towel? Or it could be, and this is the less obvious one, the toilet?”

Julian grinned at Noel.

His knees suddenly weak, Noel sat down on the toilet lid, allowing space for Julian to enter the reasonably small bathroom.

Julian closed the door behind him and lent against it. There was a very awkward silence as both men stared at the floor.

“So,” began Julian, “What’s up?”

Noel shot him a dirty look.

“Nothing,” he said through gritted teeth, “nothing is up. At all.”

Julian gulped and looking at Noel’s feet, currently adored by pink cowboy boots, he chewed his lip worriedly, searching for something to say.

Finally he cleared his throat.

“Noel, er, about yesterday, um…” Julian faltered.

“Please…” Noel said in a soft voice, “don’t.”

The last thing Noel wanted at the moment was to acknowledge what had actually happened. He still hoped, deep down, that it hadn’t really been real.

“But…” Julian began before being cut off by Noel.

“Just leave it alone, ok?”

Julian took a step forward and placed a comforting hand on Noel’s shoulder. Noel gaze moved slowly up his arm and rested on his dark brown eyes. He shivered and felt his body relaxing and his frown soften. Feeling his guard be slowly let down he panicked.

Noel pushed Julian’s hand away forcefully.

“Don’t touch me,” he warned.

“Don’t touch me, don’t ever touch me. Not when we’re onstage, not when we’re backstage, not when we’re out buying… hammocks.”

If only the world knew how it really was. That is was him, Noel who always resisted.

Julian folded his arms across his chest and looked down at Noel intently. Feeling Julian’s stare, Noel shifted uncomfortably.

“But you’ve never had a problem kissing me as Old Gregg,” Julian blurted out.

“That’s because I’m not Old Gregg!” Noel yelled, “I don’t have a vagina, funnily enough, and I’m not gay!”

Yet another strange silence ensued.

“Vince is just more… more” Noel said in a quieter tone.

“More you?” suggested Julian.

Noel nodded, “Yeah.”

Noel closed his eyes and placed his head in his hands. He let out a long, slow breath and stood up. His body was now dangerously close to Julian’s.

Julian opened his mouth to speak but Noel beat him to the chase.

“I’m done talking, I’m done thinking. I’ve got nothing to say and I just want to forget,” he hesitated, “just forget and disappear. So if you’ll please move aside, I need to get out of here.”

Julian flattened his body against the cold wall, leaving just enough space for Noel to squeeze through between him and the basin. In an attempt to not brush past Julian, Noel’s hip hit the basin and the sharp pain of broken blood vessels caused him to grimace. Still his shoulder grazed Julian’s chest.

Noel opened the door and the thump-thump of the loud music from upstairs filtered though and became more recognisable. His hand resting on the doorframe, Noel quickly glanced back at Julian and walked down the passage.

Should Noel:

A: Get completely out of his mind drunk

B: Find a random woman to get off with

C: Go home