Site   Home   Help   Rules   Terms of Service   Login   Contact Us   the Boosh Slash Haven   
       Stories   Browse   Titles   Authors   Series   Search   Featured Stories   Top Tens   Most Recent   Challenges  
Penname: SimonBrisbane [Contact] Real name: Messiah Of Sleaze
Member Since: 15 Apr 2010
Membership status: Member
Bio:
Hey. I'm Simon.

I'll be honest with you - I'm not here to write, even though I consider myself to be a writer (well, truthfully, I consider myself to be a troubled degenerate poet of the streets, but we're really splitting hairs here). No, the reason I'm here is to enjoy the fanfiction. And not the light, loving, "awwww"-inducing stuff, either. I want the dirty, perverted, sleazy, Howard-on-Vince, Julian-on-Noel, hardcore fucking. Don't judge me.

For those of you who are reading this to actually get an insight into the man that is Simon (can't see why you would, but there's a lot of weirdos out there) I'm a young man from Brisbane, Australia. Never heard of it? Well, according to National Geographic, it's the 2nd most haunted city in the world. Remember that. It might win you a washing machine on a game show one day. Also, for some fucking reason that is unknown to me, Bob Geldof is our offical ambassador, even though not only is he not from Brisbane, he's not even from Australia. Hell, I'll wager he couldn't even find us on a map!

I work at a fast food restaurant. I'll give you a few seconds here to make fun of me. I spent far too much of my paycheck on clothes, shoes, scarfs, sunglasses and other such crap. I don't know why. Probably comes from the part of me that's a vain little faggot.

I spend most of my time reading. If any of these names mean something to you, or strike up sentiment in your heart, there is a chance we'll get along: Oscar Wilde, Jack Kerouac, Hunter S. Thompson, Chuck Palahniuk, Poppy Z. Brite, William S. Bouroughs, Irvine Welsh, Kurt Vonnegut, Bret Easton Ellis.

Music-wise, I like punk rock, of all types (The Damned, Dead Kennedys, Stiff Little Fingers, Zounds, Subhumans, The Distillers, The Clash, Sham 69, Siouxsie & The Banshees, Richard Hell, Dead Boys, etc., etc., etc.) and glam rock (David Bowie, Lou Reed, Iggy & The Stooges, New York Dolls, T. Rex, The Runaways, Johnny Thunders, etc.) and piles and piles of other music.

Other seemly random factoids about myself: I've never spent more than $10 on a pair of sunglasses; I'm a citizen of New Zealand; I did my Community Studies project on the implied-sexual relationship of Vince and Howard; I plan to die by the age of 33, as that's the age that Jesus conked it, and I consider myself a modern-day Christ; I know every ABBA song off by heart; and I am in love with a man called Benjamin who will never love me back.

Well, that's all folks! If any of this idiotic rambling has made you anxious to meet me, my email and MSN address is didyouknowthatjamesdeanwasgay@hotmail.com. If you think I'm a pretentious arsehole, I'll first congratulate you on being so astute, and then suggest you remove your head from your arse.




Now, seriously, get the fuck out of here.
[Report This]
No results found.